Choosing What’s Most Important

It’s that time of year again, the time where we want to show the ones we care for that we are truly grateful for them. Lucky for me balance is my new mantra because I know not everything will be perfect. I may not find the perfect gift and I may even lose my center once or twice.

I have to keep telling myself everything is perfect and I’m doing my best. Mom gets this, Julien my son gets that, Dad gets this and etc. etc.

Lists and more lists of things that have to be done before going out of town.

Will I make it?

Balance. Ah yes, everything is ok.

My mind wants to focus on all the imperfections and balance wants my attention too. From time to time I think about a client I helped a few years ago, her closet is in the photos above. When she hired me she told me her husband and her mother had both died within 6 months of each other and every time she walked into the closet she felt paralyzed by the sadness because it is the closet she and her husband shared.

Can you imagine losing 2 people that you are so very close with? Some of you reading this can say Yes. Some of you, like me until a few months ago, can’t identify with this magnitude of loss. A young woman I spoke with last week said she lost both of her parents and her uncle during COVID. When I mentioned letting some material items go to make room for this new version of herself that she was wanting I could hear the recoiling in her voice and the fear stopped her from moving forward in tidying with me.

You can’t force yourself to do anything even when it could help your situation. If you aren’t ready, honoring that lack of readiness is the best step to take above anything else. You will eventually become ready. You will purge the feelings of loss and it will become a new part of you. You will feel stronger and you will feel wiser.

These two women remind me why choosing what’s most important for me is the best thing I can do in any moment. I can fret over the tiny details or I can grab a bigger paint brush and make broader strokes and be happy with the outcome. Today is one of those days where my mind wants to fret and I’m sure you can relate.

This is just a short blog I wanted to share in hopes of helping anyone reading that may be feeling the pains of loss or may be living in a home they feel is just too full of clutter to get started. The first step is the most difficult but it is also the most rewarding.

The client from the photos above was visibly changed from the inside out after we finished her closet. She began with a low quiet tone in her voice, shoulders slumped forward. At the end she had joy in her eyes and was ready to pack for her trip to Spain, she even said she loved her newly tidied closet.

Reach out and ask for help, you may be surprised how good it can feel, or don’t. Making the choice that’s best for you is what’s most important.

​I’ll keep my mantra of balance close by, it’s the best choice for me.

Happy Holidays,
Kate